023: Transitioning From Female To Male In The Pursuit Of Living An Authentic Life with Devin Fitzpatrick

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In celebration of Pride Month, we have our very first male guest on the show who is trans and identifies as queer. That person is Devin Fitzpatrick. Devin and I went to high school together and in this episode, he opens up about his experience transitioning and how the process of doing so drastically changed his life for the better. 

In this episode we discuss:

  • The moment Devin knew he didn’t identify with being female

  • What it feels like to be in the “wrong” body and being unable to identify with your gender

  • Struggling with depression and turning to food in order to cope

  • What the process of transitioning looks like

  • Hormone replacement therapy and the changes that happen in the body

  • The internal struggle and self-doubt

  • Coming to terms with your sexuality

  • Closing the book on your previous identity and being at peace with your choices

  • What dating looks like for transgender people and queer people

  • Supportive resources for the trans community

  • How transitioning drastically improved Devin’s quality of life and overall happiness

Key Takeaways:

  • Never assume a trans person is okay with talking about the process of transitioning.

  • Never ask a trans person what surgeries they’ve had or if they want surgeries unless you’re super close and they’ve consented to answer those things.

  • Not every trans person wants surgery and not every trans person wants hormone therapy; it just depends on what feels right for them.

  • There’s tons of gender in the queer community, so you don’t have to choose male or female. You can be non-binary, you can identify as genderqueer and fit somewhere in the middle.

  • Gender and sexuality are completely separate.

Action Steps:

  • Be authentic to yourself and live your truth.

  • Decide to put yourself first. Start setting boundaries with people, start pursuing things that you care about, and stop doing things simply because others expect it of you.

  • If you are non-trans, don’t always depend on trans or queer people to explain what it means to be trans – do your research. Keep challenging yourself to learn more and be corrected by people if you’re wrong.

Devin said:

“There are things that I want to do with my body medically that is a long process and it’s not easy, and the government doesn’t make it easy. So deciding for me to love my body right now until I can reach those goals works for me.”

“Being trans or being queer doesn’t have to be a total barrier [in society]... but I feel like even non-trans listeners or non-queer listeners can kind of relate to the fact that if you show up for yourself and you validate yourself, life can be a little bit more manageable…”

Resources mentioned:

More from Devin Fitzpatrick:

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